Atelo

In political science, the term banana republic describes a politically unstable country with an economy dependent upon the exportation of a limited-resource product, e.g. bananas, minerals, etc. It was invented by American author O. Henry in 1901 in reference to Honduras and neighboring countries which came under the extraordinary influence by multinational American fruit corporations such as the United Fruit Company. ( source:: wikipedia). I would want to change or modify the meaning for India. “ In the real world, the term banana republic describes a mentally unstable country with a mind dependent on self-acclaimed powerful politicians, gunda raj groups. It was invented not by just one but every Indian who is right now just quietly sitting at home, watching the news after coming back from work, too tired to give a shit about the country or to even move your body to change the channel, we watch someone openly threat individuals and announce a bounty on their heads, nose, legs....

I don’t like confrontations! My best escape word is, ‘Chuck’. The problem with problems are that they require time and I just feel that if we sit down and invest time in chalking and solving them, we’ll miss out on the important reasons to live. It’s just my opinion and I am not here to make people change theirs. My biggest fear is the fear of, “We need to talk” If you want to really have a conversation which involves pointing out my mistakes, please leave a message after the beep or email or WhatsApp me. I will get back to you with a powerpoint presentation (preferably a keynote[I am a mac user bitches]). The keynote will have all your answers, while a conversation will not. While you talk, confront, yell, accuse me of things, I will be like Sameer from Dil chahta hai. I would only be saying,  “Haan mai, magar wo, suno toh, tumne toh, lekin main, kabse keh, Main aakash ke yahan…Hello??” That’s the problem with my problem. I never mention the good points to win the arguments. Whe...

Correct me if I am wrong, but the most common answers to any Indian’s favourite movie would be: Andaz apna apna, Dilwale dulhania le jayenge, Welcome, Dil chahta hai, Queen, etc. etc. (This list is mine actually).  I am writing this blog post on a movie which was suggested by one of our close family friends. More like family actually. Ginni Aneja, (Feels too odd to call you aunty now that I am old).  So here we go! The movie starts with a bit of a tour of London, where Chaudhry Baldev Singh is seen feeding the pigeons (odd hobby, but he is Amrish Puri). He is shown as a stricter version of Alok Nath, A no-nonsense man. He has a lot of love in him, but only and only for India. Like he has so much of love for India that there is a scene in which he receives a letter from his childhood friend Ajit from Punjab and he can actually smell the letter to sense the apne desh ki mitti ki khushboo. While Laajo  in serious doubts if he even remembers what frag...

When people are asked about the mistakes of their lives, it takes them in a flashback. The most common ones are relationships, careers, decisions, marriage, habits etc. The biggest mistake of my life is that I am an ambivert. According to the dictionary it means, a person who has a balance of extrovert and introvert features in their personality. According to me, it is a dog/bitch who is a tiger in his own street. To elaborate more, ambiverts would sometimes get confused to call a spade, a spade. Their most common answer to any question is, “I don’t know.”  If you are at a gathering and you observe someone who is quiet, it doesn’t mean that he/she is an introvert. They very well can be an ambivert. They find their space in a room full of idiots, they have conversations with themselves when these idiots are having discussions about the lamest topics.  I should be honest here, at family gatherings people have noticed my silence. But in my head, I am ord...

Agar pyaar dosti hai, then why didn’t Rahul end up with Anjali in the first place? The writers, directors, the whole crew was smoking some real bad stuff. The script had the protagonist, Rahul quoting, “Pyar dosti hai...agar woh meri sab se achchi dost nahin ban sakti, to main usse kabhi pyar kar hi nahi sakta ... kyun ki dosti bina toh pyar hota hi nahin ... simple, pyar dosti hai.  And then rather than falling for his best friend, he falls for Tina who just makes him go head over heels. Without noticing the best friend shedding tears or making desperate attempts to make Rahul for him. Anjali leaves Rahul and Tina in peace (a heartbroken escapist).  Time flies and we have Tina on her death bed asking Rahul to find happiness and solace and to take care of their 8 year old daughter Anjali (Rahul was high throughout to notice Tina giving him subtle hints about his best friend). Tina dies, leaving Rahul’s mother and little Anjali to play cupid between ...

“The last time we spoke, you asked me to move on, to get married. You joked about how you wanted to have good food and enjoy looking at someone getting sacrificed. Do you remember how I wanted to let the whole world know about us but you stopped me? Do you remember, that you never stood by me when your possessive best friend wanted us to call it off? Well amidst those fights, your nonchalant behaviour, I fell out of this relationship. Moving on, My family is really happy that I am open to the thought of marriage. The funny part is that I am on every online matrimonial portal available but looks like I am not the only one there. My dad recently showed me a few photos and profiles of some shortlisted prospects. Looks like your elder brother has also made it to the top 3 of my Mom, Dad and aunt's preferences. Oops! Looks like the Tequila started talking instead of me! Gtg! Have a great night!” 

It is a horrible feeling when someone calls you slow, I was definitely not dyslexic. I had bullied the tube light all this while and looks like karma was giving me a taste of my own medicine. The tube light flickered and lit up the whole room in a while, the light bulb tried to open his eyes, and breathed his last.